Author: Frank

In my infancy, I learned to speak Cantonese at home with my family; I spoke it before any other language.  As I grew up in Puerto Rico, I next learned Spanish.  While I officially learned it in the Catholic school, a block from my home, I also learned it from talking to the locals and watching television.  My parents ran a restaurant, and we spoke to the patrons in Spanish.

As I turned ten, we moved to Florida.  While I studied English in school in Puerto Rico, I failed that class.  I learned English out of necessity when I arrived in Florida and dove into the public school system.  Similarly, I learned through speaking with neighbors and watching television.  Learning a language through a classroom environment lacks the real feel of the language.

Continue reading “Counting your chickens before they hatch” →

Upon first hitting the pandemic, they sent us home to work remotely.  None of us had ever encountered a worldwide contagious health risk.  The initial mail from the office came in on the first week of March 2020; we played it by ear.  That message assured us that we should work remotely for at least three weeks.  They didn’t say that ironically.

As I continued to work from home, I watched the daily updates on the status on the pandemic.  Naturally, news networks broadcast what little information they knew.  We set our groceries aside for three days waiting for the COVID-19 virus to die on those surfaces.  Panic stricken viewers tweeted questions as we collectively watched them scroll across the bottom of that screen.

This included absurd questions like, “Is it safe to pick up take-out from Chinese restaurants?”  A collective “fuck you” from me to everyone who continued to call it the “China Virus”, understanding that it spreads fear and impacts Asian people.  You suck.

Continue reading “Natural curiosity” →

I started driving in Florida in my teens.  While my mom paid the cost of car insurance, I paid for most other expenses with that car.  For instance, I paid to register the car.  In order to renew the car’s registration, I jotted down the odometer reading (total mileage).  At the time, I simply followed instructions and didn’t obsess about why they wanted this information.  I simply rushed to get in and out of the DMV as quickly as possible.

Eventually, I learned why they noted the mileage.  They set the cost of renewing your registration to be proportional to the amount of wear-and-tear on the roads.  The more you ‘damaged’ the roads, the higher the cost to register your vehicle.  They calculated this fee from two numbers:  the weight of your vehicle and the distance you drove it.  The rationale?  It should cost more to register a 2000 Suburban driven 25k miles than a 2023 Miata driven 2k miles.

Continue reading “Taxes and representation” →

Many years ago, I sat in a meeting where we composed a questionnaire to send to our organization.  We coordinated these questions with our human resources department and one question they suggested adding was, “What are your preferred pronouns?”  Although I certainly worked in the DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) space in the company, this practice was unfamiliar to me.  Once I understood that it implied gender identity, I pushed back on the question.  In principle, I had no problems with transgender workmates but believed this was a bit more ‘in your face’ than we wanted to be.

One teammate pushed back: they disproportionately target this community.  Who, if not us, would champion this cause?  To advocate for a community which you understand and with which you identify comes easily.  To empathize and advocate for a community which you don’t understand nor with which you identify becomes considerably tougher.  Ultimately, they were right, of course, even if it took time for me to realize it.

Continue reading “Should you keep the tip?” →

During my tumultuous days of high school, I watched The Breakfast Club in theaters.  As you might expect, the film spoke to me in ways that many other films did not.  They deliciously juxtaposed the characters in the library and allowed them to grow closer over the course of a day.  I could not help but to identify a little with each of them but probably most with Brian Johnson, the geek played by Anthony Michael Hall.  The film ages well and continues to be exceptional.  If you haven’t, you should absolutely watch it.

However, I’ll focus on two scenes that talk about the topic of virginity.  The first scene is a long discussion on whether Brian remains a virgin; to which Claire eventually asserts that, “I think it’s okay for a guy to be a virgin.”  This puts that debate to rest.  The second scene is where Claire’s virginity comes into question, and the only options are:  prude, slut, or tease.  To where she finally admits that she has yet to do it.  The scenes are far enough apart so that you may gloss over the double standard between men and women.

Continue reading “It’s not about preserving life” →

On an especially lazy day in Florida, I peer up at the partly cloudy sky.  Most of the visible sky shines blue with only the occasional patch of clouds.  Like most people who observe the cloud formations, I eventually see different shapes that resemble real-life objects.  The monochromatic shapes metamorphosize from one object to the next.  They aren’t the actual objects, of course.  The clouds are merely collections of humidity suspended in the atmosphere.  Their resemblance to any real object is merely a coincidence.

However, our minds fool us.  We desperately impose order in shapes that occur strictly randomly.  If you should see a woman’s face or an AT-AT Walker in a cloud formation, it merely reflects what currently occupies your mind.  The objects that we see have no correlation to real life.  If anything, what you perceive reflects your mind, not the image that you gaze upon.

Continue reading “The threshold of ‘a few bad apples’” →

On an otherwise ordinary day, I respond to a Facebook thread about a Marvel movie, Eternals.  It’s not from a group that I would normally subscribe, the reason why it shows up on my timeline is because a friend responded to it.  Having been burned by others’ opinions about movies, I typically try not to listen to articles and reviews on films.  That said, I saw enough clips of this film to know who stars in it, and later heard observations about how it has the most diverse cast in a superhero movie.  Although I had yet to see the film, that’s how I responded.  I applauded the film for being diverse.

Spoiler Warning:  Going forward I’ll mention plot points in a number of films; please skip if you don’t want them revealed.

First, this film did not impress my friend.  This is completely fair; he’s entitled to his opinion, and I had yet to have seen the film.  Second, he took his grandson to see it and didn’t feel the couple’s scene on the beach was appropriate for his grandson.  This is completely fair too; portraying adult relationships in a particular way is not appropriate for young audiences.  Lastly, he asserts that all other MCU films that preceded it were completely fine for his eight-year-old grandson.

Continue reading “Sex, violence, and objectionable content” →

Some friends and I met over some food and beers and chatted on a lazy Monday night.  During this particular evening, we chat about a wealth of different topics as we dodge the noise from the Monday Night Football broadcast.  I mentioned that as I recently watched a TV show, I had a flashback from a Mexican actress that I watched back in 1972.  Another such moment was regarding a Robert A. Heinlein novel, Citizen of the Galaxy.

My friend recently picked it up and is actively reading it.  I asked a few follow up questions to confirm that it is indeed the book I remembered.  I politely omitted to mention big plot points to avoid any spoilers.  He confirmed it; it was the very same book.

Continue reading “The price of wisdom” →

On a lazy afternoon in Florida, I visit a friend of the family at his restaurant.  I worked in very this restaurant before, under different management and a different name.  I simply called him “Mr. Five” because his surname sounded like the Cantonese word for ‘five’.  We catch up on how our lives progressed.  At some point, he outright suggests that I should “go back to China to find a Chinese girl; it’ll make your mom happy.”  While I didn’t respond in the way that I otherwise might, this conversation filled me with disappointment.

Now, I’ll go into a little detour.  I’ll give you a sample list of names, and I’d like you to ponder about what they have in common:

• Anne Frank
• Betty White
• Mother Teresa
• Rosa Parks
• Julia Child

Continue reading “The mother of all dilemmas” →

I have been a computer geek since my teen years.  On my early days, I learned to program on a TRS-80 Model 3.  It literally had no ability for any graphics; it was all text.  We saved data and programs on cassette tapes, which predated floppy diskettes.  Yes, you read that right.  My sister got the first legitimate computer in our house which ran MS-DOS.  This computer had a handle and its own screen.  Toshiba sold it as a ‘portable’ only because it was completely self-contained.  I don’t believe that this computer fit in any backpack I’ve ever owned, and it weighted about nine pounds.

In high school, I carried a lot of books.  I lugged around both a backpack and a purple duffle bag with school colors.  Once I entered college, I continued to carry more weight than I needed to, opting to keep books or other items with me in case I wanted them.  This included music in the form of cassettes, and later CD’s.  I opted to be prepared at the expense of lugging all that weight.

Continue reading “What a difference a week makes” →